Balance: It is not something you find, it is something you create!

In my last blog, I mentioned the three legged life balance and that explaining what I meant was a whole other blog....so here it is!

I thought I had this work-life balance thing sorted a few years ago. I put half my effort into work, and half my effort into life so my work - life balance should be sorted - right??

I went to London on a Monday Morning, did the WORK part all week and then came home on a Friday - Friday evening, Saturday and Sunday would be a blur of doing the LIFE bit - visiting all the people I needed to see, Parents, In laws, friends....not forgetting the Husband...as well as all the things I had to do so our LIFE carried on as normal...my laundry, his laundry, meals for the freezer, meals for the dog, sorting out who was walking the dog every day for the next working week, had we got all appointments covered, was somebody cleaning the house, did they have a key, shopping, sending stuff back - and then showing up at social events trying to be the life and the soul, on top of a Sunday roast every Sunday - because I couldn’t let the LIFE half suffer....right??

WRONG - sure fire way to burn out, of course, but I was missing the point - and I think a lot of people are!

A lovely, wise man told me that it is a three legged stool, this balance we seek (because a stool with two legs falls over) and to research his theory, I looked at ‘Work Life Balance’ according to Wikipedia:

“a concept including proper prioritizing between "work" (career and ambition) and "lifestyle" (health, pleasure, leisure, family and spiritual development/meditation)”.

Work - Career and Ambition So he is right about the three-legged stool because that list of things falls into three categories, not two: - this should be about you - career and ambition needs to fulfill YOU. Not ‘because you have to go to work’, Not ‘because you don’t know how to do anything else’ not being stuck in a job or career where you feel you are being overlooked or know you can do better...Your Career and Your Ambition takes up one third of this balance so it needs to satisfy you and bring you joy - not the complete opposite!

Life - So this is where my controversy comes in - I believe this is where it splits - and all too often, you see people thinking this part of the balance is running around after partners, children, parents, in-laws, pets even! And we have to do this stuff, we do! And we want to for the most part! So here I am going to take Wikepedia Leisure and Family and for most of us that I hope would include some health, leisure and pleasure!

Self - This leaves Spiritual Development and Meditation which I believe belong in a whole category of their own and again I hope would include some health, leisure and pleasure!

But who on earth has time or inclination for all that stuff? Well spiritual development, (and meditation for that matter), come in many forms - my wise man and I agree that it is plain and simple taking time for YOU. It doesn’t have to be yoga and group meditation (although don’t knock it till you’ve tried it!)

It might be an hour with a good book, a soak in the bath without interruption, listening to music, taking a long walk - but it is, without question, YOU TIME; time for your mind and body to recover, recoup and recharge - without interruption.

It took me a long time to get this balance right in my life, it isn’t an overnight fix but once you get it, it changes your perspective....whatever it is that works for you this weekend, take some time for YOU - book it out with your family and selfishly take it - put yourself at the top of your to do list and not only will you benefit but so will those around you as well.

I promise! I would love to hear what works for you..........

Putting yourself to the back of the queue is just one of the 15 ways we talk about how women can potentially hold themselves back. You can meet Gina and learn more from her about this and MANY other issues that women face by attending one of her events in LONDON or WORCESTERSHIRE or you can attend workshops in other parts of the country - click here.

Gina is part of Lynette’s Core Team at HI, acting as a Facilitator, Blog Editor and Mentor as well as a Business Strategist in other walks of life.

Through her organisation, Sirius Business, she mentors and coaches women who work in the corporate world, as she has done for over 14 years so she understands first hand many of the issues these women face. Gina is also a commercial mediator and a Project Manager.

Gina is a renowned speaker all over the UK; she lives on the borders of West Midlands and Worcestershire with her husband Dave and their two Labradors, Darby and Jess.